Carrie's Philosophy & Background:

Divorces aren't just becoming more common, but increasingly bitter. The majority of women feel hurt
by men, misunderstood, and some even feel underappreciated and disrespected by men, as they handle
the majority of the household errands, and responsibilities with the children, while also juggling a career
and balance in the workplace. As these feelings have escalated amongst women and in western society,
men have been progressively amplified to appear as merry-andrews, no more than blubbering fools, on
television, in women oriented magazines, as well as in our cultural conversation. Between the jokes
women share and distaining remarks about the male species on Facebook, Twitter and other social
media, men are constantly bombarded with negative images & remarks about their sex.

The aftermath of this social aberration, which is continuing if not growing, has led men (especially in
western society) to avoid marriage, steadily become more commitment-phobic, and has even led some
men to feel acceptance in P.U.A. ("Pick Up Artist") groups & seminars, where they teach men to degrade
women, cheat, and even be physically aggressive towards women; providing a percentage of these
emasculated men a feeling of faulty power over women.

Sadly, boys and many young men, have been raised around this impoverished view of male identity,
leaving them confused as to their role as a man and feelings of guilt, wrongdoing and bewilderment as
to what a man's purpose really is. This is amplified if, as a child, it was commonplace for their mother,
and any female family members and any female friends of their mother, to discredit their father with
jokes and made unfavorable statements against men as a whole.

For women, there is confusion and disorientation as well. Countless women struggle with their identity and role as a girlfriend or wife,
mother, and/or career woman, and the tension of being a nurturer and caregiver. Never forgetting an ever existing strain of social
pressure, to be attractive and sexy but never "too sultry", be womanly but not bitchy, and have expectations but never nag. For
younger women, just add in the pressure to get married, start a family - and, in many cases, never forgetting to get at least their
undergraduate degree if not masters, launch a stable career, and navigate through a pile of student loans.

Since 2004, Carrie has been coaching men, under the pen name of Shelley McMurtry, on the evolution and psychology of attraction,
sexuality, and female responses; helping to debunk some of the myths and fantasies popular television has tried to convince men
"should work". After distinguishing the obstacles, grievances, commitments, and even hypocrisy that men expressed or recounted to
her, she decided to enter the women's market.

Her ambition?....

To assist women in obtaining better understanding and acceptance of men, while also helping women to interact with men more
surely, effectively communicate, perfectly "seduce", and position themselves to have a unique relationship or marriage - the type of
relationship that, unfortunately, few women ever get to experience.

As the saying goes,
"truth is stranger than fiction", from her own life and dating mishaps, as well as from the experiences of her female
friends, and the thousands of men she's worked with over the years, she dissects several core subjects that seem to be going
unnoticed, but are creating contempt, inferiority and confusion in most relationships and marriages.

Bridging the gap between the traditionalists, feminist, and the "non-feminist"/
"anti-feminist" movement:

At this time, there are three prevailing sides when it comes to family & marriage matters for women.

- Traditionalists (more conservative, oftentimes perceived to be less for women's rights & achievement)

- Feminist (typically perceived to be left-leaning and aggressive in their stance for women's rights)

- And the "anti-feminist" or "non-feminist" movement (perceived to be non-traditionalist, yet not for the typically more contentious
views of the feminist side)

Oftentimes these three sides seem to be in an unproductive skirmish, instead of looking at all views and sides, and then taking into
account factual studies and their results which act as solid confirmation, and not allowing their view to be as "black or white", but
instead equalized. Trying to equalize these views, in conjunction of basing her concepts on studies and proof, is the philosophy Carrie
has to the "His First Choice .com" website and writings for women.

What history can teach us....

In 2005 Carrie became a self-proclaimed history buff. This passion was conceived with an interest in St. Domingue (present day Haiti)
influence and architectural history. Starting when St. Domingue was a French colony and the Haitian Revolution (which was a slave
revolt) from 1791-1804, which resulted in Haiti becoming an independent nation, free of slavery, on January 1st, 1804. Her study and
affection for historical architecture spawned a number of trips to New Orleans and Louisiana, and throughout the south. Her research
soon entered subjects having to do with plantation life, and the conversations that have been carelessly removed from our classrooms,
having to do with the all too common rape of slaves from their masters (who were usually married men), the real lives of plantation
mistresses, and the hardships which women, especially mix-raced women, faced in the 1700-1800's. These factual accounts of raw
human nature and barbarous plantation owners, shed light on the many hardships those enslaved, and women as a majority, endured.
From her taste for West Indies furnishings and architecture, to her interest in historical studies in human nature and marriage/
relationships, Carrie places some of these real life teachings in her writings, delivering both the beauty and brutality which history

Beau Soleil Haiti/ Beau Soleil Communauté:

Located outside of Leogane, Haiti, Carrie directs a program called "Beau Soleil Communauté", alongside the other Beau Soleil Haiti
programs, which offers marital and relationship counseling to couples, and teaches pregnancy prevention, parenting guidance, and
issues related to hygiene, health, and well being. The Beau Soleil Haiti programs also assists with education and schooling, in addition
to secondary education. The Beau Soleil Haiti model is developed with the intention of allowing Haitian men, women, and young
adults develop themselves personally and financially, and eventually have the resources, knowledge, and ability to venture out on
their own with their own business. For more information, you may visit:
Beau Soleil Haiti

Historic Preservation:

Carrie is also a member of the National Trust for Historic Preservation and believes wholeheartedly in the preservation of historic
properties around the world.
National Trust for Historic Preservation In addition, she is a member of the Friends of Drayton Hall in
Charleston, SC.
Drayton Hall
From Carrie Tillman
MyMind Publishing
Copyright, MyMind Publishing  MMXIII
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